Unanswered Queries

This morning I had a few errands to run before  I could go biking but I finally made it out of the house and headed to Lindsley Park. I had a weird dream about something or other but the most interesting thing so far are the confetti egg remnants around my perch.

There's confetti, flour and crushed eggshells everywhere! A small part of me is a bit grossed out by the eggshells but, mostly, I'm amused. I didn't know that anyone still played with confetti eggs or, even more fascinating, that people still go through the trouble of making them. It's notoriously tedious and time consuming.
I remember mom used to prepare weeks in advance. She would start collecting, cleaning and coloring eggs as early as February, or January, if she anticipated an egg shortage. To this day, I don't know who keeps track of egg production and consumption like she did (except for maybe commodities brokers who invest in eggs and whose livelihoods' depend on it) or how one goes about this task. WTF, mom?
I still don't know how she managed to cut such a uniform hole without shattering the eggs, or how she found the time to wash, color and fill them with colored paper confetti and flour! How she loved seeing us play with them! She really loved Easter festivities and I don't know if there was another occasion that she enjoyed as much.
These past few weeks have been stressful. Our trip to India was postponed, Purandar Acharya is throwing himself into this work, I'm biking to fill the extra time, Chandaneswar is focusing on his health and diet and Krishna Chandra seems perfectly content without his electronic devices. (He lost privileges a couple weeks back) He's almost too happy and content with out them. I mean, how will I punish him if he misbehaves? I could take his bike privileges but truly it would hurt me as much as him. I love riding together. It's the most fun we have whether we're alone or together. I really enjoy it and it gives us a great excuse to go outside at a moment's notice.
Yesterday, Chandaneswar, Purandar Acharya and I were watching a Bengali film named Kaler Rakhal but only the first hour and a half was available on YouTube. I'm so upset because there are a couple of Baul songs that I love but they're on the second half of the film. I've been searching everywhere for it with no luck. Where can it be??
Well, we're probably going to India this summer but I'm upset that we won't be able to travel with Lokojit prabhu. He's the best travel guide ever and knows all the best spots and people. At least we still have each other. I feel like we're desperately clinging to each other now more than ever before. I feel lost and alone adrift an ocean of anxiety but my raft mates keep my company and sanity. I don't know what I would be with out them. I don't know where I would be without them. I don't who I would be without them. Sometimes I think to myself, "Renounce this lifestyle and give yourself completely to Gauranga!"
What shall become of us, Thakur?

Life Experiences

My schedule is really different this semester. I have a light school schedule throughout the week, but Friday is my lightest day of all. At the beginning of this semester, I was a bit frustrated that I could not schedule more classes, and had an hour gap between two classes. However, now I have found other activities to occupy my time at school, and manage my time there wisely. This way, I do not feel like I am commuting in vain, but accomplishing other things also. Yesterday morning I joined my friend Dolly and her friend Cheko in the gym for a morning workout. He is really helpful and knowledgeable, with a sense of humor. I also plan to practice piano for an hour on my break.
My theory class is pretty relaxed. Our professor gives us ample time to study, work, and inquire on our own time. Additionally, because we have students of different levels in the same class, we pair into small groups and work together. This is nice for me because it helps me recall and solidify my knowledge of music theory by helping my group mates.
We were discussing trustworthiness during class; I mentioned that people feel at ease around me, strangely, and often recount their personal troubles, trauma, or struggles to me. I told her and our group-mate that even complete strangers open up to me, tell me embarrassing, traumatic, and even incriminating stories about themselves, with no hesitation.
That is what finally pushed me toward the therapies, and why I decided to pursue music therapy as a career.
On the ride home, I met a young woman named Anabel on the bus. Anabel introduced herself briefly, and then told me about her troubled past, and hopeful future. Again, I was shocked at how much graphic, personal information she volunteered to me. Additionally, she reflected about her children's future and opportunities. I reassured her that she was a great parent; she was cultivating healthy, trusting relationships with her children, and that it would reap its rewards one day. I gave her my phone number, hoping that Anabel would call one day in search of a trustworthy friend.