Monday, May 30, 2011

Victorian Attire and More

Its been an entire two days since my last post and I think I've restrained myself long enough from ranting about something else. Today I will talk about the many wonderful inconveniences of being a woman. You might want to close your browser now or listen to a super-wonderful-ecstatic-awesome-glorious kirtan instead. Or just deal with it.
I love long full skirts, if you've ever seen me (or my wardrobe) in person it wouldn't be hard to spot. As much as I love broomstick, multi-tiered, ruffles, lace, starched petticoats underneath... they are a god-damn nightmare to deal with in the bathroom. Naturally, this gets me thinking and then I wonder what the hell was wrong with Victorian women. If I can't handle the immense amount of fabric in a single multi-tiered skirt, then how in the hell did Victorian women survive in those days? They look gorgeous, elegant, lady-like and sophisticated but they don't let you piss, shit or bleed in peace! I don't think you understand exactly how much fabric was required for the construction of one's undergarments in those days. Thinks about it; it wasn't fashion, ladies, it was some kind of cruel and unusual punishment. Were they all just too strung out on opium to give a damn? Masochists? Into bondage and shit? C'mon, really!
Still, as frustrating as they are, it probably won't stop me from wearing broomstick skirts in the future. Unless I'm bleeding. Menstruating is frustrating enough as it is, dealing with that much cloth would just send me into a murderous rage. Plus Victorian women had crotchless drawers which is better than any contraption that I can think of. Pretty ingenious and redeeming all at the same time. It gives me hope for the future...
Okay, I'm gonna watch Law and Order to calm down.
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