Thursday, February 25, 2010

Mountains of Service

Gaura Purnima is coming up and I’m getting ready by preparing the Lord’s new outfits. My husband, Chandaneswar Prabhu, says that I should finish them soon but I didn’t realise how much work needed to get done, so I procrastinated and now I’m feeling the consequences. I’ve only finished the interfacing/lining or whatever you call it. (You can tell here that I’m a novice and fairly unfamiliar with terminology but I don’t care so shut up!)

Speaking of familiar… I still wonder what my familiar would be, wolf or tiger? I don’t particularly care for other animals besides some dogs and small pets. I always wanted an exotic animal familiar but I have not decided which one. know what supernatural power I want; I’ve always wanted to be able to start fires from my palms. I’ve even dreamt about it, I burned demons with my fireballs and walls of fire… I don’t know but I think I may have picked that up from DnD and other role-playing games. Can’t remember anymore. How the hell did I end up talking about this? I know I had a purpose coming here… oh, right… expression.

Have you ever wondered about people’s intentions towards you? Sometimes I feel dejected because I make friends with people and later I realise (or wonder if) they are not genuinely my friends. I’ve noticed that my so-called friends only talk to me when they need something but are quick to ditch me in other situations; maybe this is all in my head but I really doubt it these days. I guess I’m just a little depressed so I thought I’d write away in hopes that the distress would melt away. Sometimes I wish that nobody ever knew me, then maybe I wouldn’t have to deal with the disappointments in life that come from relationships. It seems easier to just not even bother with some people rather than risk getting emotionally injured.

 

No comments: